Loving Well

Since my last blog post, I have been on a journey. I decided to seek the path of choosing love and found myself on an adventure! Matt and I decided to begin "spear-heading" operation solve the homeless problem in Raleigh. Well, at least that is where my vision was headed. With a little thought and community involvement, why couldn't we...right?

What I have come to realize is that there are so many wonderful people in Raleigh on the front lines already working hard to serve the least: the hurting, the homeless, the elderly, the lost, the hungry, you name it there is an organization out there that you can get involved with. I am learning the importance of getting on board with people that already know what they are doing.

After talking to many people and attending a few meetings, we are finally on our way! In a week and a half we will be serving a meal at Urban Ministries for about 45 people. We have started making preparations and are getting so encouraged by the way the people in our small congregation at East Bridge want to jump in and help serve a meal at the Women's Center. A few of our guys are even going WAY out of their comfort zone to bring a stocked cooler and bug spray to one of the homeless camps we've recently found out about this Saturday morning.

My purpose in writing about this is to encourage my brothers and sisters in Christ to open your eyes and see the need in your communities. There are people that you walk by every day who need love in some way. Who are they? Are you going to keep walking by and telling yourself someone else will help them? I challenge you to just start somewhere: mow an elderly neighbors lawn, make a meal for someone in need, listen to someone who has no one else. If we all start remembering that our ordinary American life is actually a mission field, what could we do? Could we turn our world upside down by showing that we actually love well?

Are you in? I know I want my kids to grow up spreading this love to others!

Choose Love

I am nearing the end of my reading of Barefoot Church that I had mentioned in my previous blog post. It is fantastic! The big thought I am trying to carry through this week is "Choose Love".

I think it is so easy for me to get caught up in the consumerism of America. Don't give too much of your time, your resources, your energy, your whatever because you need to make sure you have a bank of it stashed away. I know this is a grim way to think about it but the more I think about my lack of love for others in the past, it just sickens me. I am vowing to remember to choose love. This passage from Barefoot Church really hit me...

Here's a suggestion: when in doubt, choose love.

• Can't decide if you should give? Choose love.
• Can't seem to swallow your pride on a foolish matter? Choose love.
• Having a hard time forgiving someone? Choose love.
• Rather keep your time for yourself than help someone in need? Choose love.
• What would Jesus really do? Choose love.

This makes the choice for me so simple. All of my excuses, exceptions, and choices can be completely turned around if I choose love. I am so excited to see where choosing love will take my life and the lives of my family.

How could I not choose love with this precious cargo God has decided to put me in charge of?

Am I a Dreamer?

Lately I have been reflecting on my life and it's purpose. I have felt an awakening to begin acting with compassion and sincerity for people. Specifically, those in need in my community. This call has led Matt and I to begin reading a book together called Barefoot Church by Brandon Hatmaker.

I have only read the foreward and first chapter so far but so far it is speaking to me EXACTLY where I am! He states "We've settled for serving ourselves and serving as an event rather than serving those in need and living in a new way of life that Jesus has called us to." This is so true of my life. I find plenty of excuses about why it's just not possible for me to serve those in need. I am tired from chasing around 3 little boys all day, I have to cook dinner, Matt works long hours, oh and the list goes on and on. But, I feel a revival within me starting. So much so that it's making me feel unsure of things I always felt HAD to be a part of life.

What will this look like? That's part of what scares me a little...I have no idea. I am quick to categorize myself as the left brained gal with a step by step plan. But, I am realizing it just takes something to wake up inside to quickly change me to a dreamer. I am dreaming big for the future of our lives. Dreaming that we all have compassionate hearts that are forging our way to help "the least" in ANY way that we are called. I am going to start by getting involved in an established local mission. I am thinking Raleigh Rescue Mission.

Who are "the least"? As Brandon Hatmaker puts it "The least is a collective description of those in need. It describes anyone who simply has less. Less can be anything from being underresourced to being along, from having inadequate or no housing to little or no food, from the rarity of comfort to the complete lack of freedom. Less is simply less." I have always thought that in order to have a serving heart you needed to be working in the homeless shelters, a missionary, etc. I think that I am realizing that I need to look for the least in my neighborhood, at the store, AND on the street. It could be a lonely widow, a child starving for attention, a sick friend. My heart is changing to seek the least and seek to serve them by setting apart specific volunteer time but also as my eyes are opened to notice the need on a daily basis.

I am excited to dream big and live it out with some practical ideas and sentiments from this book. Who else is dreaming out there?

Lingering Words

I am in the second to last week study by Lysa Terkeurst called Unglued. It has been a phenomenal study for my sister and I. Each week I have challenged to change my reactions based on a biblical reality rather than my own raw emotions.

This week the challenge is to empty yourself of the damaging labels you have made for yourself and replace them with lingering words. In other words, how do I want to be known. I am still in the process of narrowing down a couple of my other categories but one I have definitely decided on is thankful. I want to be known as a woman with a thankful heart. I want to be thankful in the midst of plenty and little. I find myself so often listing all the things that I wish I could have, or change, or do. I am emptying myself of that label "never fulfilled" and replacing it with thankful.

Yesterday I prayed that God would begin to work on my heart to be filled with thanks. I challenged myself that one time during this week when I was faced with a situation that angered me I would find time to first Thank Him. Two hours later, I am running in the beautiful sunshine and loving the 80+ degree weather. I made the halfway turn and was pushing my double stroller up a hill that always makes a good challenge. This hill runs right alongside a golf cart path in my neighborhood and I came upon 4 older gentlemen driving to their next hole. The first cartful waved and gave me a little motivation for running while the second came with a comment. "You need to get your boys some sunglasses." Now, in this moment all I wanted to do was turn around and tell that gentlemen that I offered them to my son and he refused to wear them while my eight month old would just eat them so none of this was my fault. I didn't neglect my children's needs, I am a good mom, etc. Basically, I had an unglued moment within myself! I made it about another 1/2 mile and all this internal demeaning chatter in my head just overcame me and I stopped running. Along came a rush of another set of thoughts... "You can't even finish a 3 mile run. How do you ever expect to be prepared for a 10k in a month and half?" All these are lies that I can quickly let myself get trapped in if I don't look to Jesus first.

Right there in the middle of the sidewalk this little voice in my head said "Did you mean it? Will you be thankful in the midst of anger?" I stopped walking and just aloud started spewing off all the things I was thankful for. It started with the things I can always find easily. Thank you for the beautiful sky, the warm sunshine, my wonderful sons and husband. In the middle of all this Levi says "Mommy, are you still going to run and stop talking?" I laughed and told him that I would walk but he would have to listen to all the things I was thankful for right now. I even got to the point that I thanked God for the gentleman who had concern for my children's eye safety. I was not saying this mockingly, I really did and do mean it! God gave me the grace to have my heart turned around 2 hours after I resolved to become a thankful woman. Wow!

I pray he gives me more opportunities to show my thankful heart. I want people to hear the name Alex and think she is so thankful. I have a long way to go but I am making imperfect progress!

 

How could I not be thankful for this goofball? My little lunar boy or as I was calling him my looney boy:)

Reflection and Resolution

It's that time of year...

As I look back on this year, I have so many things to be thankful for. I am so thankful that my husband has stepped out of his financial comfort zone and completely supported me in staying at home. I know that this season of life with my two boys being little will pass so quickly and I know that I will never look back and regret the decision to put teaching on hold to be at home with my kids. I count this as the biggest blessing of 2012.

I have been thinking a lot about what changes I have made for the better (or not) and this has made me resolve to make some changes for the year 2013.

#1. Find joy in the moment. (This is something I have been really trying to focus on for the past month but I know I need practice. My Type-A personaility wants to have a clean house, all the landry finished, children with perfect manners, daily lessons I write and complete with the kids, execersized, and a steaming hot dinner on the table all by 6:00 every day. To this date, this unreasonable expectation causes me to overlook SO many moments that could just bring me joy. I resolve to change this in 2013!)

#2. Believing and Acting on the power of prayer (Although 2012 led to major growth in my prayer life, I feel the need even more to improve upon it. I think back on how often I throw out the phrase, you are in my prayers and how little time I really spent praying for those people in need. I resolve to pray and believe in it's power.)

I feel the need to insert a little side story to this. Practically the moment I found out I was pregnant with Asher I prayed that God would use his life to be a blessing to others. That is why we chose the name Asher which means blessing. I know that he is not even 5 months old yet, but God has blatantly answered my prayers. Asher smiles ALL the time, literally! His first two little sounds sound like "Hi" and "I Love You" to the point that he had a whole table full of people at Chick-Fil-A mimicking him back and forth at lunch today! We left and there were smiles on these people's faces who walked in looking a little worn out ;)

#3. Eat Less, Move More (I don't have any giant aspirations of trying to become a marathon runner at this stage in my life but...I am commiting to running at least two organized 10k's, one in the spring and one in the fall so that I work on getting more consistent with my running again.)

I am putting up my resolutions because it will help me look back and reflect throughout the year. Also, if you are wondering how I am doing with my resolutions please ask me...trust me I need the accountability!!!

A Thousand Gifts

Just before Asher was born, I decided I was going to try to read One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp. That idea came and went because Asher was born the next day so I have been reading bit by bit as I find a little time here and there! The major point I have taken from the read so far is to be thankful for the little things in your life each day.


I have decided to start my own list of a thousand gifts God has given me. Each week, I am going to attempt to post a few of the most memorable ones for me. Although this is a challenging time in my life to find the time to sit and think about these things, I think that it's even more important to cherish the little moments of beauty.

1. Morning sun peeking through the bedroom window
2. Taking the time to live fully in a moment
3. Levi's excited squeal "Daddy's home!"
4. Little hugs on an elevator
5. My Bible and morning coffee
6. Our parents prioritizing spending time with us and their grandchildren
7. My husband's call to check on my after a long sleepless night.
8. Peaceful morning walks with my boys.
9. Snuggling with Asher
10. Meals from gracious friends

Graduation Day

Happy Graduation!

Today was a wonderful day of memories but also a little sad. I had a graduation party for the boys today. My daycare closes next Friday. It has been wonderful to have the same little guys the whole time. I have loved watching them grow up and it is so hard for me to imagine not seeing their little smiles everyday. What a time I will cherish! My hope is that we can keep their little friendships strong by getting together for play dates!!



We started our party with a little awards ceremony.

Rowen was awarded for having the largest
vocabulary and the most inventive playing ideas

Elias was awarded for having the best
smile and ability to make everyone
laugh with him.

Levi was awarded for having a never
ending energy supply and the ability
to maintain extreme focus.

Chase was awarded for having the best
belly laugh and sweetest "bye-bye"

After awards, they opened their graduation presents.

Levi's zebra backpack

Elias's penguin backpack

Chase's frog backpack

Rowen's dog backpack

And we had to finish the party off with some artwork. We made little handprint shirts.

Words cannot express how greatful I am that I have gotten to know each of these little guys and their families so well. As we go into the next chapter of life becoming a family of four and myself being a stay at home mommy, I will take all that I have learned from these little guys for sure!